Raising Teenagers is terrifying.

You know what no one ever tells you about being a parent? A lot of the time it’s downright terrifying. I have 4 children, Paige is 19. Shane is 10, Kylie is 6, and our little guy, Brody is 17 months. When my oldest was a baby, I remember telling people I can’t wait until she’s older so I don’t have to worry so much.

Have you ever seen Terms of Endearment? Shirley McLaine’s character Aurora is a worried mom who checks on her baby every few minutes at night because she’s imagining crib death, until she wakes the baby. The baby starts screaming and Aurora says, “That’s better”. That was and is me.

No one told me there would be so much to worry about and the older they get the worse it gets. When they are little you can control their environment. Where they sleep, who holds them, what they eat, who they play with, where they go, are all up to you.

The older they get the more independent they are. It’s so much harder to keep them safe.All I want is to protect them from all the dangers of the world. I guess the secret is to just do the best you can and trust your instincts.

I worry just as much (probably more) about my 19 year old than I do about the baby. She is a really smart, beautiful girl. Sometimes she doesn’t make the best choices and most of those times it has something to do with a boy. I used to joke that she could date after she was married, when she was 35. I wish I could have made that a reality.

Life was so much simpler when I had final say in who she spent her time with. It’s so hard to see a confident, smart, young woman doubt herself, demean herself, and question herself because of a boy. As her mother I can’t say anything, because I don’t understand that he loves her.

I hope he understands that her Dad & I Love her more than words can say. We’ve dedicated our lives to building her up and I’ll be damned if I let some punk tear her down.

Now We’re Cookin’ With Gas!

As a mother of four, I won’t pass up a chance to get out of the house by myself. It’s a rare moment that I can pee with the door closed, let alone leave the house without someone clinging to my leg begging to go with. So when I was invited to a baby shower for a friend of my husbands I didn’t think twice. Sure I wouldn’t know a soul there, but no kids, lunch & drinks- I’m in. Heck, I’ve been known to hide in my bedroom closet just to get 5 minutes to myself.

My husband is good at many things. Cooking, cleaning, & taking care of kids aren’t any of those things. I knew I’d be gone past dinner time.  You’d think a grown man who is the father of four wouldn’t need to be reminded to feed his children, but he does. I have come home before to the kids telling me dad made popcorn. And that was what they ate ALL day. I left him instructions to make a frozen pizza for dinner. Seems easy enough right?

Two hours after I left the house I start getting texts and calls.

4:30 p.m. “Does the oven work?”

4:35 p.m. Um, yes. Why?

4:37 p.m. “I can’t get it to turn on.”

4:38 p.m. “Does the gas work?”

I’m getting a nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach at this point. The oven worked fine this morning. What in the world could he possibly be doing.

4:40 p.m “Push the knob and turn it to the temperature on the pizza box.”

4:50 My oldest daughter calls. “Dad has out his tools. He’s hammering on the oven.”  He’s doing what, I say?  “He has out his tool box. He took the knob off and he’s trying to fix the oven.”

At this point I tell him just order a pizza or make peanut butter sandwiches. “Geez, Why can’t I leave the house without all hell breaking loose.” Now my husband is obviously angry & snapping at me, “the oven is obviously broken.” It’s not, but whatever!

Fifteen minutes later my phone rings again. My daughter, “Do we have any carpet cleaner”? What happened now, I said? “The dogs ran in from outside with mud on their paws. They ran all over the carpet in the family room. Dad is freaking out.”  I know I don’t have any carpet cleaner so I tell her I’ll pick some up on the way home. It’s just mud, I think. It will be easier to get up when it’s drier anyway. “Too late”, she says. I’m afraid to even know what that means.

I walk in the door to complete & utter chaos. There are tools all over the kitchen counter. The knob for the stove is broken in half. I walk over, push the metal part the knob fits over in and turn on the oven. Gee, it works. Shockingly, my husband didn’t realize that you have to push in the knob while you turn it. Seems pretty basic for a guy with a college degree, but I guess not. Then I turn around to see my carpet. Holy crap!! He bleached it! Yep that’s right. Plain old soap- nope, water- nope, he went straight for the hard stuff. Who in the name of all that is holy bleaches the carpet?? My darling husband that’s who.

That was a rough day. It’s one of the many reasons I’m so happy I found e-mealz.com. Now not only do I always know what I’m making for dinner. I can make it ahead of time so my husband can reheat it in the microwave – not the oven. E-mealz gives you a week of quick and easy recipes with a shopping list that can be tailored to your diet or even the stores you shop at.

As far as getting some “me” time, I’ll be hiding in my closet if you need me.

My life as June Cleaver- or not.

As I was scrapping the peanut butter off the wheels of my sons Cozy Coupe  police car this morning I was remembering back to what I thought it would be like to be a stay-at-home mom.

When I made the choice to be a stay-at-home mommy I thought life would be so easy.  As I sat in Chicago’s notorious rush hour traffic fighting to make my way home after a long day at work, I daydreamed about what life would be like once I was at home all day.  I would be June Cleaver.  Blissfully sending my children off to school with homemade lunches, notes tucked inside after preparing an amazing breakfast of Star wars themed pancakes, fresh-picked berries, & freshly squeezed juice. The little ones & I would spend our days at the park, having picnics before returning for naps. I would quickly clean my spotless house and then prepare a hearty meal for my family to enjoy.

Hahaha, was I wrong.  I quickly learned that staying at home was much more work than I thought  it would be. Since I was at home everyone had something for me to do- for them- since, you know- I’m at home, with nothing to do. Doctors appointments, fundraisers, room mom, team mom, cub scout mom,  cheer mom, shopping, internet detective, chauffeur….  Not only is there something to do every waking minute of the day there are children in my house all day, messy children.

The dream I had of this spotless home quickly vanished. Within the first month I realized that since we were at the house all day, we were making a mess all day. Playing, baking, breakfast, lunches, laundry, dogs out, dogs in, kids out, kids in. Grass, mud, bugs in & out of the house all day long. My reality is frozen waffles, hoping I remembered to buy milk, & the local pizza place on speed dial.

I wouldn’t trade any of it though. There are some days that I tell my husband, Jim, that I would happily trade with him and go to work everyday. I wouldn’t though. I like my messy, chaotic life.